Another weekend of stuff
Mar. 25th, 2012 06:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sacredchaoSomething of a bipolar weekend. Saturday was more or less unalloyed awesomeness. Despite not being eligible to test due to lack of attendance (injury) I went along to the white star testing for derby. Several people said awfully nice things about how I skate and told me that had I been eligible to actually test I would have comfortably passed. I hung about to help out with the higher grade testing (time keeping for penalties) and they we went out to a bar afterwards. I'm really feeling the love at derby, my initial impressions of them as a group who would accept me for who and what I am have been thoroughly borne out. Super lovely people and I think I've found a new obsession. Also, the Racoon Club on Plenty Rd in Preston has nummeh beers at reasonable prices in a pleasing space in which it's possible to hold a non-shouted conversation on a Saturday evening. I heartily approve.
Today was a strange day. I went to see "Becoming Chaz" which I found well worth seeing. After spending the entire movie watching him transition with the loving support of his partner though I was thoroughly twitchy and just went outside and cried. I *hate* crying in public but there wasn't really an option. This is in no way a comment on my ex; that was never going to work and no blame attaches at all but I was so seethingly jealous when I compared my past year or so that it was a bit much.
The train home at some point changed its mind about being a Sandringham train and decided to go to Cranbourne instead. The signs at Flinders st still definitely said Sandringham when I got on and I heard no announcements to the contrary. Catching the train back to South Yarra I was read as trans on the train. The guy wasn't nasty but he was disconcertingly and cheerfully garrulous and pushy ("I'm a film maker - I make documentaries.") and *very* insistent about trying to give me a piece of "blessed" rose quartz to the point of re-accosting me as we walked up the platform at South Yarra. I have no idea what his motivations were but it was odd.
Oddly, I was musing this morning about my visible persona on the basis that I'm generally read fairly uncompromisingly as female (and after this afternoon, that's been punctured a bit). I'm starting to want to claim a queer identity as well because that's starting to be important to me. I guess that's no different to any other lesbian in this city but for me it's another layer to add on top of the gender identity thing. The inclusiveness from derby *did* include a bit of that as one end of the table was a throughly boisterous collection of beer drinking dykes who included me as one of their number. This was good beyond description.
God I want a cigarette and I may well weaken this evening.
Today was a strange day. I went to see "Becoming Chaz" which I found well worth seeing. After spending the entire movie watching him transition with the loving support of his partner though I was thoroughly twitchy and just went outside and cried. I *hate* crying in public but there wasn't really an option. This is in no way a comment on my ex; that was never going to work and no blame attaches at all but I was so seethingly jealous when I compared my past year or so that it was a bit much.
The train home at some point changed its mind about being a Sandringham train and decided to go to Cranbourne instead. The signs at Flinders st still definitely said Sandringham when I got on and I heard no announcements to the contrary. Catching the train back to South Yarra I was read as trans on the train. The guy wasn't nasty but he was disconcertingly and cheerfully garrulous and pushy ("I'm a film maker - I make documentaries.") and *very* insistent about trying to give me a piece of "blessed" rose quartz to the point of re-accosting me as we walked up the platform at South Yarra. I have no idea what his motivations were but it was odd.
Oddly, I was musing this morning about my visible persona on the basis that I'm generally read fairly uncompromisingly as female (and after this afternoon, that's been punctured a bit). I'm starting to want to claim a queer identity as well because that's starting to be important to me. I guess that's no different to any other lesbian in this city but for me it's another layer to add on top of the gender identity thing. The inclusiveness from derby *did* include a bit of that as one end of the table was a throughly boisterous collection of beer drinking dykes who included me as one of their number. This was good beyond description.
God I want a cigarette and I may well weaken this evening.
