sacredchao: (Default)
sacredchao ([personal profile] sacredchao) wrote2012-09-04 11:09 pm
Entry tags:

Another step forward

I called the surgeon's office today and made an appointment for an initial consultation at the end of the month. That's all the intermediaries dealt with now and it's really just a matter of a certain amount of preparation and waiting. More scary and exciting. All that intervening time will fly past before I know it.

This is not the endgame. It's a major milestone but there's a perception that surgery is the be all and end all of transition or even that it *is* transition. I've already transitioned. My life has changed, I've repositioned and recontextualised myself socially and this is simply addressing a key point of the physical dysphoria. It will make the process of continuing to define myself a *lot* easier and resolve all sorts of cognitive, metacognitive and emotional dissonances. So it's less a goal and more of a major milestone in the journey. Beyond that there aren't all that many big events; I just get on with my life and with working out what that life entails.

For all that I know it's going to be a painful, expensive and tedious process I can't begin to explain adequately how much I'm looking forward to it though. It's not going to be a magic bullet for my life - nothing is that. It will make me feel so much more coherent though. It'll make me that much more myself. I get to appreciate how much that can mean and I wonder how many people really get to understand that at a visceral level.

[identity profile] hometime.livejournal.com 2012-09-05 12:19 am (UTC)(link)
You sound very sensible, relaising that this won't suddenly change everything.

[identity profile] splodgenoodles.livejournal.com 2012-09-05 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. Sorry, can't think of anything more profound, but it would seem wrong to say anything...

[identity profile] taleya.livejournal.com 2012-09-05 11:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Finally losing the foreign flesh! YAAAAAYY

[identity profile] paypabakwriter.livejournal.com 2012-09-07 11:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Your attitude is amazing! This journal of yours is truly filled with hope and courage for anyone pondering or going through this transition. Just know that I am with you in spirit.