and behind door number three...

[sacredchao]

I'm starting to get tetchy about how others perceive my gender. In some instances it's perfectly reasonable...people calling me at work have only my voice to go on and today I had a barrage of "Sir" and "Mate" and similar. I *have* to sort my voice out, it's the biggest deal breaker I have in terms of passing at the moment. At the other end of reasonable was the wedding invitation from my cousin. He (or whoever wrote the content for the invitation, and I'd lay good money it wasn't actually him) knows about my change of name. If they know about that then they know why. So it's not a huge step for them to work out that they really should NOT be prefixing it with "Mr." *twitches* I'm torn between ignoring the whole event (which wouldn't be well received by family) or just turning up frocked up seriously hard. Let's see how long it takes them to recognise me.

In the middle of this is work. It shouldn't be hard for me to start making requests about pronoun usage but somehow it is when I see how seamlessly people still gender me as male.

This is back into triangular peg territory. I'm now finding myself unwilling to use public toilets because walking into either will draw attention. I've already mentioned change rooms. I can play this game and enjoy it sometimes but more often it's just awkward and uncomfortable.

Comments

[taleya.livejournal.com]

Ugh, you're probably gonna cop it at work for a while - they know you well enough to have known you as male, and don't quite know you well enough to give enough of a shit to watch their steps and break the habit.

Frock up and fuck the haters :D If you had smaller feets, I'd lend you the boots o doom :D :D

So sorry

[paypabakwriter.livejournal.com]

Assert yourself, love! This is part of what that waiting period is about, testing your endurance to a certain extent.

[crazyjane13.livejournal.com]

Like taleya said ... frock up. This is who you are - glory in it! And know that every gorgeous piece of clothing or jewellery or attention to makeup is one more piece of armour against the stupid.

Is there someone you can take to your cousin's wedding as a companion?

People will get used to it, and the more you assert yourself, the quicker that'll happen. The voice is a bitch to deal with, but it's not like people haven't mistaken voices before. Just correct them gently.

[ms-kilian.livejournal.com]

I am curious as to how one goes about sorting one's voice out. Elocution lessons? Practice? You tube?
My job requires a range of voices - I have office voice, meeting voice, phone voice, court voice, stern voice etc. They have just evolved naturally over the years, and I barely notice when I transition from one to the other.
Also, I find my voice is different when I speak in French as compared to English. I think its to do with where the tongue is placed and where the sound is generated in the throat/face/nose etc.
Maybe we should spend one afternoon together making silly noises.

[sacred-chao.livejournal.com]

We should...sent you a message.

[hometime.livejournal.com]

JB has a lisp when speaking normally, but doesn't when speaking in Indonesian, or heralding, or performing Shakespeare. He thinks that it is because he is concentrating more.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

Also: poke me on IRC tonight. Saw some gorgeous stuff at the vic markets that would look stunning on you. I has shitty iphone pics!